EXPLORING SECOND LIFE
And there I was, a woman without religion but with faith to praise one hundred Gods.
- lori Novo
"I really want to see you
Really want to be with you
Really want to see you, Lord
But it takes so long, my Lord
My sweet Lord
Mm, my Lord
Mm, my Lord..."
-lyrics
Welcome, this is Luanes World - Le Monde Perdu - Summer 2024 (Moderate)
I grew up in the catholic faith, with a great-grandmother who guided us under very strict
religious guidance that cast fear, more than love to God. She truly believed that the only way to
make it to Haven was to follow the Catholic faith. So punishment, hell, and purgatory were some
of the words she would use on us to keep us in line and obey the Lord. More than a loving and forgiven
father, God was painted to us as this unmerciful being who could see everything we did, even our
thoughts. In a way, she was right on that one, but to her, we could be struck by lightning if
we ever did something wrong. Something as small as liking a dress from a magazine. That is what
she would call a vanity sin and so we should feel ashamed and pay penance for our sin with
Twenty Hail Marys and twenty Our Fathers and don't forget our pet, Billy the goat for a blood
sacrificial! Okay, I am exaggerating a bit there with the goat. :P
Anyway, growing up under my great-grandmother's faith was utterly torture.
Going to church with her for mass meant that for the whole duration of mass, our eyes had to
be locked on the priest and we were not allowed to make any sounds, not even a cough or a sneeze.
Don't get me wrong, my great-grandmother was a very loving woman just too intense when it
came to her religion.
I, however, began to unfollow her faith and demands at a very early age. I am surprised she didn't
disown me. However, the way she treated me after my rebellious uproar changed drastically.
She no longer showed physical affection to me as she did with her other great-grandkids that
continued to obey her more out of fear than out of love and respect.
I became the black sheep and with the years, almost all of the other joined me as well.
It was hard to follow her faith that more than love and peace was all about pain, sadness, and
punishment. Standing with her meant walking on eggshells at every second with God. A small,
unintentional wrong step could mean damnation in hell for an eternity.
I did continue practicing the Catholic faith but on my own for a few more years.
However, for some reason, my spirit felt empty and so I searched in other religions for what my spirit
was lacking. As I continued to soul struggle one day I felt it in my heart, what I had been looking for
was already inside me. It had been there since the moment I was born and that was to be good, to
care for the world and every single living thing. To live by love because once we live by love,
everything good falls into place like peace, joy, acceptance, forgiveness, encouragement, etc.
But here's the catch, the beauty of living this way is not with the purpose of earning a spot in Heaven
or to avoid hell, those two things are already on earth. The beauty should be in doing it because it is the
right thing to do, for ourselves and others, with no rewards expected, other than knowing that a life
lived with love for the world can only bring light and light is good, very good!
So that is how I came to be a woman with no religion but with a very strong faith in a
merciful and loving God.
♥
Credits On Me
What a beautifully difficult journey. Thank you fpr being so giving with you. Your soul is beaitiful Sweet Lori!
ReplyDeleteThank you so much dear friend. You are too kind with your comment. Have a beautiful life! :))
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